Archive | July, 2003

Vince Neil and the Bunny Ranch

31 Jul

So the day after we went to see Vince Neil of Motley Crue, he evidently went to visit one of the infamous Nevada brothels. Check on this article posted on

Police in Nevada have issued a warrant for the arrest of M�tley Cr�e singer Vince Neil, who allegedly attacked a prostitute at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch.

The warrant stems from a July 10 incident involving Andrea Terry, a sex worker at the brothel near Carson City, who accuses Neil of grabbing her around the throat and throwing her against the wall, according to the criminal complaint. Neil faces misdemeanor battery charges and a bail of at least $1,000, according to a Dayton Township court clerk.

Neil was arrested last year for an incident involving record producer Michael Schuman, who accused the singer of punching him in the face and knocking him to the ground (see “Motley Crue Singer Wanted On Assault Charges”). Neil entered a no-contest plea to the charge and was ordered to complete 100 hours of community service, pay restitution and go through the booking process, which placed his fingerprints on file with the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department.

If convicted of this latest assault charge, Neil would face a maximum of six months in jail and a $1,000 fine, according to the Lyon County district attorney’s office.

Reps for the Moonlite Bunny Ranch refused to comment. Neil’s manager didn’t return calls.

Well, I doubt Vince will want to come back to Nevada. Not a big loss, let me tell ya. Some day, I’m going to do a driving tour of the local brothels. I just want to see if I can catch a glimpse of the employees!

Surgery Isn’t the Fix-All

31 Jul

A man I know recently had gastric bypass surgery. Yes, he was a very big man, and he made the decision because he wanted to improve his health.

He had the surgery a few weeks ago, and since then, has suffered a heart attack and a stroke. He has been in a coma since emerging from the operating room.

I think that a lot of people are seeing the well-publicized success stories of stars such as Carnie Wilson and Al Rocher, but we’re not seeing everything that could go wrong. I had no idea the surgery could cause a stroke.

I feel so bad for him. In an effort to improve his health and appearance, he has suffered insurmountable complications, and most likely won’t be the same when and if he emerges from the coma.

Birthday Wish List

30 Jul

Not to be blatant, or anything, but in addition to my Amazon Wish List, I’d really like some weight lifting gloves, or this Heart Rate Monitor. Or if you’re feeling extra generous, this Body Fat Monitoring Scale and Heart Rate Monitor package.

OK, I’m done being selfish. For now.

Queen Clueless Srikes Again

30 Jul

Queen Clueless was back in the gym this morning. We were in the locker room at the same time again, and we both pretended our previous conversation didn’t happen.

She was waltzing around the locker room wearing her short silk robe that she wears while she’s getting ready. Except this morning, the back of the robe was firmly lodged in her crack the entire time.

I’m pure evil, aren’t I?!

Queen Clueless

29 Jul

I had an interesting experience at the gym yesterday. There is this woman there, we’ll call her Queen Clueless, who just started showing up at the gym a few weeks ago. She wears some incredible outfits (my favorite was the pink spandex tights, belly shirt, with a maroon lace thong peaking over her waist band), and worst of all, she doesn’t have a clue of how to use the machines at the gym. She uses them so wrong that I’ve debated talking to her about hiring a personal trainer, because if she keeps this up, she’s sure to injure herself.

Yesterday morning, while I was stripping off my sweaty clothes in the locker room and preparing for my well-deserved shower, she comes up and opens a locker next to mine. She then says, “I notice that you are writing everything down when you workout.”

“Yeah, I plan out my workouts in advance and chart my progress.”

“Are you doing that Body of Life?” She asks.

“Body FOR Life? No. I did that for three months and didn’t see any results.”

“Oh, well there is this local martial arts place that has outlined a 10 week program, and everyone that has completed it saw results. I just started it today. I can make you a copy if you’d like.”

“No thanks. My program was designed for me by my personal trainer. Have you met with one of the trainers here yet?” I’m thinking yes! I have found a way to tactfully recommend a trainer to her without insulting her.

“Oh, yes. They’re great!” She then starts quizzing me on if I’m watching my calories, drinking enough water, etc. Then, she dives into her theories of metabolism.

Meanwhile, I’m just looking for a way out of this. I’m ready for my shower, wearing only one of the tiny towels they provide at the gym, and REALLY not in the mood to take fitness advice from Queen Clueless.

I mean, I’ve finally seen some results. So far, I’ve lost 14 pounds, which is HUGE for me, considering I went 6 months without any results at all. I’m finally starting to feel really good about myself again, and this woman seems to think I have a problem and she can help me fix it.

Argh. The fact that this interaction took place at 7 a.m. didn’t help matters either. Go away, Queen Clueless!

I’ll be 28 in less than a month. Here is my

In Memory of Bonnie

28 Jul

This last weekend, we lost a member of our family. My brother’s family dog, Bonnie, left us for doggie heaven on Saturday. She had a brain tumor, which was causing uncontrollable siezures.

But that was just the last part of her life. Bonnie was a great dog. She was a Lab/German Shepard mix. She had yellow fur that curled down the center of her back. On her nose, she had a white spot with the cutest little black flecks. And she had these huge brown eyes.

Bonnie had a great personality. She was so lovey, and one of her favorite pass-times was to curl up with my sister-in-law, Jane. She was great with my nephew, letting him poke and prod, and climb all over her. She’d just turn around and lick him.

She gave a log of doggie kisses. Bonnie loved to lick your hands, face, or whatever she could reach.

I remember the day my brother and sister-in-law, Jane, got Bonnie and her brother, Clyde. It was Memorial Day six years ago. I had driven up from the Bay area for a visit, and when I walked through the door, Jane was practically bursting with excitement. She grabbed me by the wrist, and said ‘I have to show you what we got’.

She led me to the back yard, where there were two adorable puppies. They must have been 8 weeks old. Clyde looks like a black lab with white on his chest, and Bonnie was a little fur-ball I could hold in my two hands.

I’m glad that they still have Clyde around, as he is a lot like Bonnie. On her last day, they took her to the lake by their house, let her swim and play with Clyde, and watched as she wagged her tail, something that had become a rare occurance. They then took her to the vet, where she went to sleep with her head in Jane’s lap. May she rest in peace. (Here is link I dedicate to Bonnie.)

Lake Tahoe, the Jewel of My Heart

28 Jul

I had a truly wonderful weekend. We camped on the beach of Lake Tahoe, at Meeks Bay. Here is a 360 pic of the beach. If you can’t view that, check out this picture.

We arrived Friday night, set up camp, and then relaxed by the camp fire. I snuck away to look at the night sky reflecting on the Lake, which was incredible. This was the first time I had been camping since having my vision corrected, and I was thrilled to leave the moon roof of our tent off and gaze at the stars before drifting off to sleep.

The campground host came over to check us in, and told us that there were new bear-proof trash containers this year. Considering a bear was spotted during our trip to the same place last year, I asked him if they had seen any bears in the campground recently.

“Every night,” the host said. “You can guarantee they’ll be around if you or your neighbors leave out food.”

Yipes! I asked him if this included coolers, and he said it did.

The story about a man being attacked while sleeping in his tent a few weeks ago flashed through my mind.

Now the rest of our group were all staying in campers. So when it came time to retire to our sleeping quarters, I got up and started putting away coolers, and gathering up all the beer bottles that were littering our site.

My brother, Chuck thought this was hilarious, and that I was extremely paranoid. He, on the other hand, would sleep soundly in his hard-sided camper with his gun inside. I was the source of much ridicule over the weekend for being afraid of bears, but I’m proud to report that I am in one piece today, after avoiding becoming bear food.

On Saturday, we hopped in our rafts with the dogs (my brother’s two dogs, my dog, plus one of my future sister-in-law’s sister’s dog) to ride down the Truckee River. This is one of my very favorite activities out here. However, Saturday wasn’t quite as enjoyable as it usually is.

About 1/4 way through the ride, we were passing my future sister-in-law with her two dogs in tow, and my brother’s dog, Ralph, decided to literally jump ship. He leaped gracefully from her raft into ours.

The water was flowing really fast, meaning a lot of steering was required. I assumed the responsibility of manning the two dogs (who sat and stood in my lap), while [The Man Now Known as The Ex] had the paddles. I ended up with cuts and bruises from the dog claws as they scrambled in and out of the raft. Tucker LOVES to raft, though, and spent half of the time swimming ahead of the raft. One of the girls in our group got seasick, and two others had their rafts pop along the way. Ours, luckily, held firm.

Saturday afternoon and Sunday, we hung out on the beach, which was just what the doctor ordered. I pulled on my shortie wetsuit and went for some really long swims in the Lake, in an effort to train for the Alcatraz Sharkfest.

Swimming in Lake Tahoe is absolute luxury. Breathing to either side, there are incredible views. The water is so clear, that you can see at least 30 feet. I watched the rocks, trees, and a few pine needles on the bottom while I swam past, and could clearly see the sun rays reflecting through the water. About 50 yards from shore, the bottom steeply drops off, and the the water turns from turquoise to a royal blue. When you accidentally swallow some water, it seriously tastes like bottled water.

Saturday night, I treated myself to a sunset over Lake Tahoe. This should give you an idea of what it looked like.

As much as I enjoyed the weekend, it’s really hard to beat that first shower you get after returning from a camping trip, though.

Happy Monday.

17 days and Counting…

23 Jul

Oh my gosh. I just registered for my 10 year high school reunion, which is two weeks from Saturday.

Two weeks! That hit me this morning as I was working out in the gym. Two weeks! I didn’t realize it had snuck up on me so fast. So now, I’m supposed to submit a one page bio on what I’ve been doing for the past 10 years.

One page. 10 years. Wow. Where do I start? I guess I’ll mention college, where I’ve lived, and where I’ve worked…. But gosh, that sounds so boring. I’m not married. No kids. Not rich. Shit. I don’t have much to rub in people’s faces, do I?

And, oh God, what in the world am I going to wear?! That panic hit me about half way through my workout. Right after I gave up contemplating what I would write for my bio. They don’t give any hints for proper attire… Would love to go casual, but then don’t want to look like a dufus if everyone else is dressy.

I think I must go out and buy a black cocktail dress ASAP.

That same weekend, I will officially become the Godmother for my best friend’s daughter. So as of two weeks from this weekend, I’ll officially be a real adult. Out of high school for 10 years, AND a Godmother. Woah.

Every time I say Godmother, I have visions of me floating around my God-daughter in a fairy Godmother outfit with a really cool wand (ala Cinderella). I must get one of those, too.

I Don’t Like Being Grownup

21 Jul

Sometimes being an adult sucks. I vividly remember an instance when I was like seven or eight, and had two friends in my room to play dolls. When they decided to leave, I couldn’t find one of my favorite dolls, and was convinced one of them had stolen it.

So I slammed my door shut, locking them inside my room, and stood in front of it, telling them that they couldn’t leave until they produced my doll. I don’t know how long I kept them there, but I do remember finding that doll crammed in the back of my closet a few weeks later.

But that’s beside the point. I was angry at them, and I didn’t have to repress that anger. I could lock them in and yell at them because I was mad.

There are some people I deal with at work that I wish I could push out of my office, and slam the door (locking them OUT), and scream after them ‘Leave me alone, you big meanie!’

But I’m an adult. So I smile at them and pleasantly ask ‘Do you need my help with anything?’


Welcome to Reno, I’ll Be Your Tour Guide for the Day

18 Jul

Over the past two days, I have toured 11 hotel/casino properties in Reno. I now have responsibility to train our call center, so I took a bunch of phone operators around to learn about the properties, transporting them in a gargantuan 14 person van.

I’ve seen approximately 33 hotel rooms, 50+ restaurants, as well as pools, fitness rooms, arcades, gaming floors, driving ranges, a bowling alley, you name it. I must have walked 5 miles each day.

Two of my favorite quotes from the operators were:
“You could fit two of my trailers in this suite!”, said in reference to her trailer home while touring the Peppermill’s Safari suite, which is 5,000 square feet.
“I like this get-up,” said by a gay man in reference to my outfit. He then said, with a flick of his wrist, “I dig Capris.”

My feet hurt. I’m going to go take a nap.

A Hot One in the Old Town

15 Jul

Last night, as I was standing on our back porch grilling some chicken, I noticed a fire in the mountains. It was one small plume of smoke, but very noticable.

As the sun was setting last night, [The Man Now Known as The Ex] and I headed back out to the porch and saw that the fire had grown immensley. It is so depressing to see the mountains I love so much up in flames, but ironically, it was really beautiful to see the orange flames, and the smoke, which was tinted pink in the sunset.

As it grew dark, the orange flames became more apparant, and I stood out there mesmerized by the growing fire.

Lying in bed last night, I kept hearing the sounds of sirens as more and more fire trucks were deployed to the scene. Thankfully, it is 80% contained this morning, and I am hoping they’ll nab that remaining 20% before the wind kicks up this afternoon.

Splish Spash

14 Jul

One of my favorite activities during the summer is to swim outside. There is something about the coolness of the water, the silence, sunshine, and bright blue sky that can perk me up any day. Every weekend I’m in town, I make sure I’m at the pool both Saturday and Sunday, usually with a book so that I can relax a bit after my workout.

Now I don’t mean to sound picky, but I spent 7 years working at three different pool facilities. I know how things should work. They SHOULD NOT work like they have been at my current pool. It’s a gorgeous facility, but the management, or lack of proper management, is really getting to me.

My biggest complaint is when I go to do laps during public swim hours. This is an Olympic sized pool — 50 meters long and 25 yards wide. Now they rope off two lanes during public swimming hours for us lap swimmers. So the kiddies who came to play get about 40 meters out of the length of the pool, and I get about 5.

I can’t tell you how many kids — and adults — cut across my lane during the course of my 45 minute swim. I don’t know why, but my coveted 5 yards is evidently much cooler than the rest of the pool. And the lifeguards haven’t said one word to any of these kids. I end up sounding like a grumpy old lady when I stop and tell them to get out of the lap lane. What really peeves me is the adults that blatently stand in the middle of my lane. Would you stand in the middle of the street?! I think not!

I figure that these kids wouldn’t appreciate it if I went running across their soccer, baseball, or basketball game, and I have begun to take the tact that I will not stop, no matter what, for anyone that crosses my lane and cuts me off.

I have a heart, people. I spent many years on swim teams where I shared lanes with like 9 other people. Hence, I know how to come up really close to someone and scare them with a huge splash, or to hit them just hard enough so they know they got in my way, and not to hurt them. This works really well when they’re hanging on the wall, because a well placed flip turn can create a huge splash just inches from the culprit.

But this really takes away from my enjoyment of my workout, and I find myself getting all wound up as the lifeguards just sit there doing nothing. Oh, wait, they were doing something yesterday — having a water balloon fight.

Another complaint I have is that the pool schedule says that they’re open until 5:00 pm. However, at 4:45, there is an announcement getting everyone to clear out. This is completely annoying when I show up at 4:15, planning to get a good 45 minutes in.

It’s really a clusterf*&k at this pool. Kids swimming in the diving area, playing in the lap lanes, and in the open area, almost every rule I enforced as a lifeguard is being broken.

You know, I really miss my lifeguarding days. Especially when I worked at the New Mexico State University Natatorium. For two years, the majority of my shifts had me guarding the NMSU mens’ swim team. I still can’t believe I got paid to sit there jamming to good tunes and watching eye candy… Especially since all of those men were better swimmers than me.

Youth Gone Wild

10 Jul

Last night, we went to see Skid Row, Vince Neil (of Motley Crue), and Poison in concert at the Reno Hilton outdoor ampitheater. (Translation for my parents: three 1980’s glam rock bands, or hair bands known for their huge hair.) It was a good show, but bad fashion was everywhere. I think we paid just as much attention to the outfits of the fans as we did to the acts on stage.

Key bad fashion highlights:

  • Leather get ups in the 100 degree heat
  • Leopard print pants in purple, pink, and red
  • A really scrawny man in a Powerhouse Gym tank top
  • Brittney Spears look-alikes with the plaid skirt, knee high socks, and chunky shoes
  • Heavy metal band shirts with the arms cut off (these were everywhere)
  • Handkercheifs tied around people’s calves (I don’t remember this from the 80s, but it was a trend that was alive and well last night)
  • Leather shorts with about three feet of fringe
  • Two men were wearing 80’s hair wigs (I admit, they were pretty funny)

I watched these people in awe, wondering where they’ve all been hiding in the city of Reno. I mean, I’ve never seen these 80’s die hards on the streets. Perhaps it takes a convention of sorts to get them to come out of the woodworks.

My favorite quote of the night came from my brother, who after listening to Vince Neil play for an hour, said ‘He sure played a lot of Motley Crue songs’. At that point, my brother didn’t comprehend that he had been watching the former lead singer of Motley Crue.

The whole show was OK. It was so long. It lasted four hours, and I can honestly say my favorite part of the show was the 5 minute fireworks show at the end after all of the bands had left the stage. Here is a concert review that describes the scene pretty well (minus some significant grammatical errors).

Oh, and the lead guitarist for Poison (C.C.) played the worst song I’ve ever heard in my life, and it was called ‘I hate every bone in your body except for mine’.

Perhaps some things are better left in the past…


9 Jul

I appreciate art, but I’m not one to stand there in a museum in front of a painting to contemplate the meaning of it.

Outside my office window, a new mural is being painted. I’ve seen sketches of what the final mural will look like…. It will be a painting of the sky. I’m talking blue sky with white clouds. So from my seat as I type, I am looking at a 60 foot by 60 foot blue wall, which is the base coat for the mural.

Now do we really need a painting of the sky here in Reno? I can already look out my window and see sky (which normally doesn’t have clouds in it), and now I will be able to look out my window and see the sky and a painting of the sky.

Some people have way too much time.

Flying Dogs, Fighting Fish, and Athletes with Axes

9 Jul

Flying Dogs, Fighting Fish, and Athletes with Axes — that is what will be occupying me for the next four days. That’s right, ladies and gents, the ESPN Great Outdoor Games are here in Reno, thanks to the efforts of my organization, and I’ll be there many hours in the hot hot sun representing Reno-Tahoe as America’s Adventure Place.

We’re hoping for 100,000 attendees to the event, and there are over 1,200 ESPN staff in town to run the event. Yesterday, we went over to the park where the event will be held. It’s like there is a new city within Reno — ESPN city. Tents and trucks and people everywhere.

The one thing that suprised me was how YOUNG most of the ESPN staff were. I’m talking ‘did you even go to college’ young. What a cool job they have. (However, working for them means either relocating every few years or living back East, neither of which is an attractive option to me.)

It was so HOT yesterday when we were setting up our booth. This should give you an idea of how HOT I will be over the next four days. SPF 45, here I come!

I have my press pass ready to go. I love having VIP access.

Tree Murderer

8 Jul

I consider myself an organized person. I manage to juggle numerous projects at once, and balance my personal life with my work life. However, I seem to have a deficiency when it comes to organizing paper. Electronically, I organize exceptionally well.

Perhaps this is a symptom of me spending at least nine hours a day on the computer, but if you walk into my office right now, you’d see that it looks like a tornado swept through it. At least on my desk surface. And on top of my laptop. And on the chairs in my office. Ugh.

I try so hard. At least once a week, I’ll take the piles of paper and neatly stack them. This only serves to prevent me from finding specific pieces of paper when I really need them. And the stacks only remain intact for a few hours.

I’ve been told that people judge you professionally by how well you keep your office. Perhaps they should judge me based on the appearance of chaos in my office. I mean really, if I can manage to get all of my projects done on time in the midst of all this, I’m really a stellar person, right?

It’s the same thing at home. It is my goal to completely eliminate snail mail in my mail box. I’ll get the house picked up, and within a few days, we have newspapers, bills, and junk mail littering the kitchen counter and table. I haven’t used the kitchen table since Easter Sunday, and that is primarily because it is the temporary sorting place for papers, junk and important.

A few weeks ago, I broke our shredder trying to make a dent in all of that mess. Really, I prefer e-mails, online bill pay, and online account access.

Now [The Man Now Known as The Ex], on the other hand, prefers paper. He even has a phobia of using credit cards. We could not be more polar opposite in that way. His method of organizing is to create multiple stacks of paper all across our study. The day he moved in with me, we went out and bought a filing cabinet and the now defunct shredder. However, he has yet to use that filing cabinet. Our extra bedroom is victem to [The Man Now Known as The Ex]’s strange method of organization. There are stacks littering the bed, the chest, the filing cabinet (how ironic), and then huge stacks in two of his brief cases.

He does have files. I created them for him because his stacks were driving me mad. I guess I can’t complain too much, though, because I don’t have much room to talk if you take a look at my office.

I wish I didn’t kill so many trees.

Diet Woes

3 Jul

If you’ve been reading this for a while, you know that I’ve been on a crusade to lose weight. It started with the Body For Life program on December 30. That was a three month diet and exercise program, after which I hadn’t lost any weight or inches. Three months of getting up at 5:40 am to work out six days a week, and no noticable changes.

So I went to my doctor and asked for a referral to a nutritionist. The nutritionist said I wasn’t getting enough calories, fat, or carbs, so we changed my diet. I did what she said for two months, and nothing happened.

She referred me on to a personal trainer, saying that I was doing everything right, and she couldn’t understand why I wasn’t losing weight. The trainer said I was getting too much fat, and I did every thing she said for a month, and nothing happened. The trainer then told me I was doing everything right and couldn’t understand why I wasn’t losing weight.

I’ve had my blood sugars tested, my thyroid, insulin levels, and they’re all normal. It basically comes down to the fact that I have the metabolism of a post-menopausal woman, despite the fact I’m in my twenties. That means that I have a lifetime of working out and watching what I eat to look forward to. Ugh.

So now I figure I’ll try Atkins, considering eating carbs hasn’t worked for me. I started this morning, and this is what is out on the Marketing department’s shared table today: a bag full of bread, Wheat Thins, a chocolate cake (with tons of frosting), chocolate donuts, bagels, and watermelon. All foods I love, but cannot eat. I type this while munching on lunch meat.

In my next life, I want to come back petite with a kick-ass metabolism.

E-mail Conversation Exerpt

2 Jul

This e-mail conversation had me laughing this afternoon:

Lynnette: I updated that link for you.
Chad: Right Arm.
Lynnette: What does that mean? Right on?
Chad: Yes… it means right on in surfer kid talk.
Lynnette: I grew up in the desert…. Don’t know surfer kid talk!
Chad: I will teach you young grasshopper.

I hope I’m not the only person who finds that funny. Anyway, we’re back from the family weekend. We boated, jet skiied, hiked, biked, swam, and rode a chair lift and a gondola. Oh, and we ate A LOT. It was a great weekend, and all 9 of us got along splendidly. Now I have my eyes set on the long weekend coming up… We’re staying around town, will catch some fireworks, hang out at the pool, and may head up to Lake Tahoe for a day. Sounds heavenly.